garden(ia) of flowers . . a silverfishstar dsrp

Instructions

sol·ace [ˈsɒlɪs] comfort or consolation in a time of distress or sadness ex: "she sought solace in her religion" themes of death & violence are prominent here please be aware. when you look at me what do you see? . . . do you see silverfishstar? or silverfishsolace? or silverfishpaw? or silverfishkit? . . . me and my past selves we seem to be like different cats. i often wonder why delphine gave me the name "solace". "silverfishpaw, to you I recognize your awareness of others and ability to make time and space for them, and to recognize their feelings of distress and comfort them and ease their worries", she said. "comfort them and ease their worries" "make time and space for them" i do not.. have time and space for many cats i do not.. recognize feelings of distress. i only seem to amplify them especially if they were to know what happened in stars mouth. star [stɑː] a fixed luminous point in the night sky which is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun. if i am now silverfishstar i am meant to burn out i am meant to fade and die but i never expected it to go like this. there are some fundamental truths you need to know. ———————— silverfishstar raced along mossclan territory-- heart pounding, she could hear the howl of a wolf behind her. she went out to fight. she went out to protect her clan. but dear forest, why did the wolves have to arrive in the first place? [ one fundamental truth is that the gardenia symbolizes: • love • purity • clarity • new beginnings silverfishstar will be our gardenia. ] she wanted to protect the ones at home she wanted to protect her kits her kits she watched one of her children lose their life before her very eyes she watched it she saw it she did nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing she froze. turning to face the wolf that'd trailed her all the way here, yet another thing flashed into her mind. [ a second fundamental truth is that the gladiolus symbolizes: • strength • moral integrity • honour • remembrance • sincerity hellgrammiteabyss will be our gladiolus. ] her heart betrayed her before her mind could act. unsheathing her claws, puffing out her fur & baring her teeth-- she lunged at the wolf. tears stung her eyes. tears threatened to fall. fall. fall? fall. they threatened to drop tears threatened to spill /she/ threatened to fall before she knew it or could register it teeth sunk into her throat she let out a strangled yowl but it was so breathy that nobody could hear it that the sound did not emit from her throat it stayed there stagnant [ a third fundamental truth is that the crocus symbolizes: • natural rebirth • love • joyful youth springtailglow will be our crocus. ] she thought about springtailglow the love of her life the only cat she knew loved her to their fullest she still remembered the vigil it was silent but it was still love. where springtailglow braided some of the fur in silverfishsolaces tail it felt warm it made her feel a thump in her chest where her heart was she thought about springtails concern after silverfishstar had returned from stars mouth stars mouth-- no, no no. that is what brought her here in the first place she should never have done this her heart raced faster, now that stagnant yowl finally escaped her throat [ a fourth fundamental truth is that the lotus symbolizes: • purity • inner strength • tranquility • & so much more lotusbloom will be our lotus. ] she thought about lotusbloom off on that exploration she wished him well she wished he was safe she was glad he did not have to be here to experience the decay to see the rot to witness unfiltered death she did not want to see him bloom just for his mind to wilt so she hoped that wherever he was he would be okay and he would tell her all about it when he came back please come back please i am begging you come back talk to me she felt the leafbare cold nip her throat- she felt something slam her already limp form into the snow she felt cold so cold and so afraid [ our final fundamental truth for the night, is that the lily symbolizes, depending on its colour: • purity & innocence • renewal & rebirth • devotion & spirituality • peace & remembrance all of the cats she knew, /unmentioned/ here, will be our lilies. ] and as the fight drained out of her she saw the colours of the world begin to ebb away and die just like she was she was dying alone she was losing her first life alone. nobody there to console her or to comfort her to be there when that godforsaken hell called the dark forest snapped her back into life +