hi guys

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i logged into ibis paint after over a year do u guys also find it easier somehow to draw in ibis compared to procreate? smth ab ibis and magma’s quality always make my sketches look so nice it was nostalgic scrolling through my old art and seeing all my map parts from years ago of course i love toonsquid but my ibis paint animation era was my favourite i js started doodling shady and then i had a full piece in 30 minutes used the saved colours from their old palette i love how shady has never been only one gender it rlly confirms my own identity to me when i’m scared i’m larping gender fluidity recently i’ve given my art chunky outlines it’s super fun especially traditional artwork drawing is ok but i don’t enjoy it anymore tbh i would have stopped years ago if i didn’t draw to stay awake in class i like music more now but i’m even losing passion for that a little i’m starting grade 5 guitar so it’s kinda fun having the challenge of note reading now tho idk if i’ll have a costume in time for halloween i only shop second hand pretty much now but ughh it’s so hard to find anything affordable and ideal for my vision i wanna go as a vampire when i’m an adult i wanna get vampire fangs it wld prolly be annoying to eat certain food w them and maintain them thoo omg guys i want kitty bites soo bad or angel fangs i wanna dye my hair red and black it was rlly weird drawing shady today cos they haven’t been my proper sona for a while now i used to hate my body but now my sonas js me recently i’ve been more fem presenting and it’s so weird until a few months ago i felt so dysphoric in a skirt but sometimes i actually feel cute i hope i become more masc soon tho cos i got a shorter haircut i think wld look cuter in baggy clothing n stuff i’ve wanted a haircut for about 5 years now i thought it was getting put off cos i wasn’t ready to let go of my long hair but it wasn’t me who wasn’t ready i feel completely alienated from my family now tho i’m the only one dressing alt and the only female out of 4 with short hair i can’t wait to move out i want to leave as soon as i can i need my own space i love it when they have a family day out and i get to stay home i discovered something horrible 2 days ago now i think my perspective on life has changed does anyone else really strongly believe they’re the only real person i think therefore i am who else misses social media from 2024 i rlly miss that era the sticker update ruined that one app icl it’s humour is so bad stickers added to comments for no reason corny stickers under serious posts i think they’re cute sometimes or on silly vids i also hate how every comment section is copy paste it was funny the first time “protect queer art” “imagine showing this to …” and then some popular copy and paste comments are “running around undiagnosed” which is just ableist sorry it is why was i being told my scoliosis had a risk of surgery it’s 20 degrees and it hasn’t progressed at all so many afternoons wasted in physio so many days i felt horribly disgusting in my own body a correction brace digging into my sides jutting out of my oversized jumper tightened to the maximum to avoid drawing attention my breathing has never been the same i didn’t want this to be so negative i didn’t want to ever somewhat vent here again sorry for this weird structure too is anyone actually reading this are any of you real i had another will wood phase recently i used to feel kind of nauseous listening to him because me and someone used to bond over his music but i forgot how much i love will wood he has definitely improved my guitar strumming and improvisation ugh guys i still don’t have a nintendo and i was only halfway through legends arceus but it does mean for the last 6 months i’ve enjoyed playing older games on an emulator so far i’m playing firered, emerald, heartgold and most recently platinum tw: my first non pirated official pokémon game was shining pearl.. the worst game in the franchise.. but platinum has reminded me of what i did love while playing through bdsp - the soundtracks i LOVE sinnoh’s music, it’s constantly stuck in my head now i’m super scared for the level curve tho 11y old me died to cynthia’s team so many times it levelled them up enough to barely beat her i named my turtwig in platinum after my first official starter pokemon from bdsp: twiggy yh i wasn’t very imaginative but cos i’ve likely lost that save file it feels like i’m carrying twiggy over into a new game and we get to have an adventure together again i also have a luxio on my team because the shinx line are my favourite pokemon another reason i love sinnoh is for introducing them the world would be so bleak without pokemon like yes i’ll spend all my money on these magical animals/objects/humanoids who fight for sport i’m hyped for winds and waves bro yk what i’m not hyped for christmas we go away every year and somehow i’ve always done smth wrong christmas 2024 bad things almost happened