Sorry about this rant or whatever you call it,,, but I feel like I need to share this cause keeping it inside is not helping me. Some of you know that I have stuff going on at home, but for those of you who don't, my mom's divorcing my dad, and she says he was abusive to her even tho he was never, and she was abusive and now I have to live with her and take care of my siblings by myself. I miss my dad. Im very scared, and I feel like im kind of dying, and I feel like the way my therapist tries to help, isnt really helping me. I also have anxiety and depression, and i've been having small su1s1d@l l thoughts recently. I hate my mom so much, because Why is she lying about everything?? Why is she just doing all this for money?? (yes, she is doing this all for MONEY. I feel so disgusted even having her as my mom. The fact that she will ruin her whole family just for money is insane and disgusting to me.) And everyone believes her because she fake cries and stuff. Honestly, I dont even know what I'm doing anymore. I don't know what to do, or how to do whatever. I feel physically sick, like I'm dying inside and I feel like throwing up even if I see a car the same color as my moms. Yes, I have so much anxiety, even the color of my mom's STUPID CAR makes me act up. (continued below)
I feel so cringe sharing this, but I feel like sometimes when I respond to all you amazing people, I sound so dull and depressed. I love all of my friends, and I feel like I'm being annoying by bringing this up all the time. Honestly, if your taking the time out of your life to read this stupid thing I'm writing, Thank you SO MUCH. I cant even begin to explain how mad I feel at myself for posting this and wasting your time. Also, as ALL of y'all may know, I love TPOT, and I kin Two. I also really love SB, and all of Death PACT. With all the oddcard stuff going on, it kind of adds to all this stuff and I feel so weird and bad and stuff. I only get to see my dad for LESS THAN 24 HOURS A WEEK. I miss him so much, I cannot explain. I love him more than anything, when Im stressed, I draw Two and listen to music. and That helps a lot, but my mom keeps trying to take all of that away from me. Im gonna stop typing now, but if you have any questions, don't be scared to ask, ill be glad to answer.
