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>Sage has logged on< Hey... i have a vent for you guys... *if u dont want to read this pls leave* So... life is amazing! *forces smile* Ok... im lying. life is horrible. it sucks like h3ll. i constantly wondering why i havent killed myself yet. Part 1. It all started around the end of April. My friends and i were battling the boys for the end of the table. My friends were arguing about the end of the table. two of them said that it would be better to sit at the end of the table AND sit w/ friends. my other friend said it would be better to just sit w/ friends wherever. i agree with my friend who said sit w/ friends wherever. i went with 3 of muy other friends to ask her if she was ok, anc she told me what happened. then i asked the others and they didnt want to talk about it. that tore our friendship apart. well, without me. they all became friends again. the ones im still friends with are (these are fake names, i shouldnt acctually say their names) are M and N. the one im not friends w/ anymore is A. Part 2. My bday was over the summer!! i told all my friends abt it and only 3 responded with 'have a good bday!!!' or 'hbd'. that was enough. all the others read it but didnt respond. thats ok. i was used to it. we also went on vacation for my bday. we went to ny! in ny we went to so many cool places! on my bday we went to the corning museum of glass. after that, we hopped into the car and drove all the way home in nc. and on the way home there was a restroom stop w/ vending machiences. wanted cool ranch doritoes but then as they dropped they got stuck so i didnt have any chips but my sister and cousins did. i was so sad. the one good thing was my parents got an applewatch. that was the only bday present that i got in 2 years. Part 3. So just a few weeks ago school started. I saw my friend from band camp who also played trumpet like me! she was sitting next to her friend finn! (now shes also my friend!) i was sitting next to my friend, star! the next day we went to go sit w/ my friend from band camp. a few days later it hit me that they were sitting w/ me for pity. yes, pity. then i went and sat alone and cried at lunch. after that my friend Annie asked me if i was ok. i said yes, me on the inside was screaming no. a few days later star asked me if i was ok. i lied stright up and said yes. now i sit silently along w/ star, finn, and my band camp friend. me and star just a few days ago called each other on google chat. and on 9//18//26 me and star exchanged stuff about us that wasnt very happy. Part 4. This happened last summer. me and my friend were best friends. i was in fourth grade. we were in the same class. she told me that she was moving to new jersy over the summer. i was absolutly devestated. she invited me to bday party!! she invited our entire tiny friend group! we had so much fun, and as a return gift she gave out tiny backpacks!! i still have mine. A few months ago in march, i got her phone number! we started texting a lot with my cousin on my ipad. then four days later... she stoped texting me. then this june she started talking for 4 more days and left again. i havent heard from her since. Part 5. So my mental health has slowly been chipping way ever since march//april. im not alr and im thinking about k!lling myself. i shound'nt be living at all. Part 6. 9/30/26 my entire family is sick, my bff isn't bff's w/ me anymore and idk what to do... I'm drowning in my sorroews OH WAIT IM SO SORRY I SHOULD'NT HAVE BURDENED YOU GUYS. pls forgive me... u can unfollow me if u want to... >Sage logged off<