At this point, it's been 7 months since the start of this....bizarre episode (if you know what I'm talking about) that has a firm hold on my life. At this point, I'm getting close to reaching to point of reaching the official threshold for PDD, and I know that ain't something to be proud of, but it is what it is. Anyways, I guess I'm doing fine. Specifically I feel okay and stable, but at the same time, I'm having very, very questionable thoughts related to how I treat my physical body. Thoughts I can't say count as impulsive or intrusive, because I know for a fact that most of the time, it's morbid curiosity about my limits. I'm not even sure if it's connected to forced to have limited time for being on this platform during the week and being bored, but who knows. And I don't want to specify it, but objectively it sounds concerning. I'm fine though. No matter what, I'm still fully intact. I mean, my body is. But yeah. Life goes on by, and nothing necessarily gets better, but I guess that's what happens. You just have to get through it, even if you don't know why you still choose it. I've been losing motivation in many things btw, but that still doesn't mean I'm quitting. I just feel really disconnected with many things right now, and have the common burden of weekend homework, so please respect that. My b-day is also coming soon, on the 9th, and I obviously can't be online when that comes, so... I don't even care about the presents or how my bday goes. I just want a cure. Um yeah end of rant.
The pic is an image I found of Canadian meadows.
