hi hi guys sorry for the inactivity uidnwgahfgw some quick updates (I'm writing this rly fast srry TvT) I'm making a fursuit thing so i've been really hyperfixated on that and that's one of the main reasons why i've been offline so much and I'm gonna go to therapy soon yay ;w; (sorry for not replying to comments guys, I promise I see them I just don't really feel like replying TwT) alright so- i'm pretty much being forced to come out to my family. my mom just came into my room and starting talking about how i'm "hiding something" from her and dad. literally the only serious thing i've been "hiding" from them is the fact that I'm not straight. i'm panromantic (and asexual but they don't really need to know that....) and I NEVER INTENDED TO TELL THEM BEFORE I WAS READY. I'm terrible at lying and my mom is a walking lie detector, so I just said "I don't want to talk about it right now" so instead she's making me tell them this week how the frick am I supposed to come out to my VERY OPENLY HOMOPHOBIC FAMILY ABOUT ME BEING GAY AND BEING F***ING FORCED TO DO IT?? THE HELL??????? ihatethisihatethisihatethisihatethisihatethisssss so the facts are that I have to tell them sometime this week. my family isn't abusive or anything, and they wouldn't throw me out. but i'm still terrified. I'm literally crying right now, I can't evenjniuebtgfuyjcgfyhtuyqjgqf I wanted more time dude <//3 also apparently I'm not allowed to close my door anymore idek WHY because WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU IM SCARED OF MY OWN FRICKING FAMILYYYYYYY (also I have entamaphobia (fear of doors/open doors) and I find COMFORT in closed doors and they KNOW THIS >:[ so dude whyyyy) so uh this is how I plan on coming out -_-" 1. im texting on the family group chat. technically I only have to tell my mom, but I cant stand my brother being homophobic anymore so I guess I'm gonna tell him too 2. tell them that i'm sorry if I'm disappointing and crap 3. send them explanations of what panromanticism is and stuff 4. send them stuff from our church website that very clearly states "identifying as gay, lesbian, bi, LGBTQ+, or experiencing same-sex attraction is not a sin and does not prohibit one from participating in the Church, holding callings, or attending the temple" so they don't tell i'm sinful for being this way (help) 5. send them other stuff from the church thing about it 6. explain a bit more 7. sob in my room until my brother starts calling me gay yeah idk I'm scared to death about telling them this <//3 (I probablyyyyy won't tell them that i'm genderfae unless they ask cuz idk how they would take it.......) what's worse is that I, MYSELF have had a really bad time trying to come to terms with myself and how I am. I still find it hard to accept myself for not being "straight" so its gonna be even harder for my family to accept me when I don't accept myself also my mom has previously said "all that LGBTQXYZ stuff is so weird, like they have terms for the same stuff ihnewgyuhv" so she's likely just gonna tell me that I'm bi, not pan because "they're just the same thing" MF IM NOT BI THERE’S A DIFFERENCE <//3 like dude I don't want to question even more than I already have T0T anyway uh idk hunwgbgejagvhngfhghdgrwjh
