“I feel like I’m the worst so I always act like I’m the best” - OH NO (Marina and the Diamonds) ~ Opener ~ Hi, I’m Rainy! I use she/they pronouns and I like drawing, writing and acting. I’ve been roleplaying for about 7 years now, though I didn’t join scratch until January 2022. I’ve had quite a few characters in gens, but I haven’t been very active for a few months. In this project I’ll be applying for Puddlekit! ~ Puddlekit ~ Personality (+) Tenacious, Curious, Social (=) Ambitious, Feisty, Stubborn (-) Hot-headed, Insecure, Volatile Puddlekit is mainly driven by her desire to prove herself and be better than everyone else. This is derived from her low self-esteem, she believes her worth is entirely measured by how skilled she is, but her bar for "good enough" raises as her skills do. When she doesn't know how to do something she takes it as a personal failure, even if she's never tried it before. Once she’s dedicated to a goal, she has trouble stopping until she’s achieved it, and believes giving up is wrong. This is usually not an issue, but mixed with how much of a high achiever she is it causes her a lot of misery. Due to that she’s very emotionally volatile, she gets angry easily and has trouble apologizing or backing down once she’s in an argument. She has issues with feeling like other cats are judging her. Despite this, she really enjoys socializing and learning more about other cats! Even though she has trouble keeping a level head, talking with other cats gives her a lot of joy. She loves learning, and feels more comfortable when she's informed about what's going on. Not knowing what's going on causes her a lot of stress, feeding into her enjoyment of gossip and hatred of liars. Gender + Sexuality Honestly idk? I like to not say for sure until I get a feel for her! Probably will end up somewhat non-binary? Maybe Demi-girl or Para Non-binary? Fears: Being judged, doing something bad, failure Goals: To be respected, to live up to expectations, to be happy (though she doesn’t know how) Trivia - I'd imagine some of her high achiever issues are due to her desire to prove herself worthy to her father, because she believes he'll hate her otherwise since she doesn't understand unconditional love (when it's showed to her). But if that wouldn't work for you I can do it differently! - Despite Puddlekit’s desire to be the best, she also does have care for doing the right thing and being kind to others. She gets it from her mom, and although I she can forget it at times, it is important to her. Similar to Deepabyss she probably would worry that Ochreserenity is disappointed in her when she’s mean to someone. (Also if Treasuredkit is Ochreserenity’s favorite kit Puddlekit might get a little resentful of them. But idk how all that will work out so it’s mostly just an idea) - Pebblekit is very competitive, and can come off as mean to others. She often feels bad about it, but tells herself she’s just encouraging them to be better, like she has alw - Puddlekit is very proud of the fact she lives in Urchinclan, since she thinks the ocean and tide pools are a better source of food for their cats, and that climbing the rocks in the territory makes cats string - Puddlekit rarely thinks through anything before she says it, but feels very guilty when she hurts someone. She’ll pretend like they deserved it though, because it makes her feel less judged by others. But deep down she hates how mean she can be and believes herself to be an awful cat who is undeserving of love. - Puddlekit definitely will be negatively affected by growing up in UC, due to all the expectations the cats are held to. Depending on what happens in her life this could go many different ways - Pebblekit is naturally distrusting to cats in power, but she's willing to give them the benefit of the doubt if they seem to have good interest at heart. - As a kit Puddle doesn’t deal with as much anxiety about her achievements, but as she get older it gets worse and she starts to show a lot more of her negative traits. ~ Closer ~ I hope you liked this application! I'd love to do some JRPs to develop relationship dynamics a bit further, so if anyone wants to do that just comment below! Thanks for reading my yapfest! (Song: Color of Victory by Rattlepate) (I would make this more aesthetic but I wanna keep it concise so enjoy the basic scratch layout lol!) (Code word: Once Puddlekit becomes an apprentice she’ll probably go to the ocean quickly and try to learn swimming, she’d probably jump right in though, instead of starting in the tide. Literal sink or swim I guess!)
