i feel empty I haven't felt like talking about this, but in third grade I met someone (A) who I had a lot in common with and I really liked them and we stayed friends for the whole year. In fourth grade, they were in a different class and met someone else(B). Come fifth, I met them and they seamed pretty ok. But in spring of that year, I hit puberty hard and they clowned on me for it, even though I told them to stop more than once. At the end of the year, we were in the baseball field walking around and (B) started to walk faster, me and (A) also speeding up, it happened two more times before (B) said to me "Can't you read the room?? We're clearly walking faster to lose you! We don't want to hang out with a fat little '85*-." I had nothing to say. I can't remember the rest but it wasn't remotely kind Come the spring of 2026 and Jade asks me out to the Spring dance, I say yes and we were both equally as awkward. Come May 22nd Jade asks me if I wanted to date him. After two months and some change, I'm starting to feel as if something is wrong, like how it felt when (B) said what they said. I've had vivid dreams as of late of Jade abusing me and I don't know why they happen, but I absolutely hate it. I told Jade about my feelings of uneasiness and they asked if I wanted to break up with them (we already have plans for the future and matching necklaces) and I of course said no, we love eachother very much. It's just that it feels strange being close to someone again. I wish I didn't feel like this (NOTE: JADE ONLY DID BAD DOINGS IN MY OWN NIGHTMARES, I DON'T KNOW WHY. DO NOT CONFRONT HIM. HE IS AN AMAZING PERSON.)
