so, i've been on a hiatus for 5 days now, funnily enough the longest i've ever been able to stay away from scratch. Lots of things have changed in my life recently, so here we go. First, i got into anime/manga, I read all of demon slayer, watched all of ALNSTG/ZMBSTG and am going to read Neon Genesis : Evangelion soon. Yeah, i like all of it, and its nice to have something to focus on after TADC ended, especially the amazing music from ALNSTG. But oh god, does it make me feel inferior. Which leads me to my next point, I was supposed to release an album today. My most recent single (Failure) was supposed to be on it. My other single (insane) was also supposed to. However, i absolutley hate this album. I hate my lyrics, I hate the instrumentals, it feels so amateur and childlike to me. Theres a lot of things i want to say: about my life, about the world, about how terrible it can be. But i can't say that on scratch, and quite frankly, i'm outgrowing this place. No, i'm not leaving, but i may be inactive fo a little while, sure i'll respond to comments, but not much else. I'm going back to a real school soon. This is were things start to get real for me, i'm not 12 anymore, i need to focus. REALLY focus. On my performance, my songs, my lyrics, my art, my mental health, and my interests. I had my birthday a few days ago, and boy do i feel stressed. None of my music makes me proud anymore. I will be making more, but perhaps just for myself until i get older and decide to become an artist. They're REALLY not for scratch. No amount of censoring would make me comfortable putting it where children can see. But i do love these songs, they're some of my best lyricism yet. Message me on BL if you want a sneak peak I suppose. But yeah, my hiatus isn't ending soon, i just needed to say this stuff, and get it off my chest.
The album was supposed to be 'Mind, full'. It was cheesy, rushed and none of the songs are currently finished. I have a problem with making songs about the same, shallow things. But hey, if you like any anime i mentioned here, good for you buddy, i'd love to talk about it sometime :)
